I've decided to try to relieve this inner burden I've had lately. I always feel awkward telling people this because it seems like a truly too far fetched idea to ever happen. Things like that don't happen to people like me! Not that anything is wrong with me, but I'm just a normal person!
At any rate... can I just say, if I could, I would dive into music after I graduate college. I so badly want to be on stage again... there's no other feeling like it. I feel like I have this insatiable craving inside me that longs for the feeling of bright lights, an audience that you can't quite see, and the silence the precedes applause. I've felt like this for a really long time. Of course, when you're little, almost everyone wants to be "famous" in some capacity. I don't really care about that so much. Or the money... not that I would turn away from it. I want that feeling... that rush. I miss being in front of people and entertaining them. Whether it be through music, dance, or making people laugh... whatever.
There are two things that I've experienced that make me feel like my soul is alive with joy...
1) being in love. And obviously, that's not an issue right now because it's non-existent.
2) performing. It's addicting and fulfilling in so many ways.
And on the subject of being far fetched, finding love is about as easy as becoming famous... so you pick. I don't know which is more attainable because to find the true and pure form of either of those requires a great deal of searching and unimaginable divine assistance.
I'm tired and too thoughtful so I better check out.
buenos noches,
cameron
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